Do You Remember The Last Encounter Before Your Child Died?
I recall every detail of my last days interacting with my son before he was suddenly taken from us. I can hear the words, see the expressions, feel the emotions, and picture the scenery of each moment.
During the summer before my son passed, he had been working for my now son-in-law, in the concrete industry. They were pulling late hours and hectic schedules, so I was trying to visit my son as often as possible during the months prior to his accident.
I remember waiting for him on his 18th birthday at my daughter's house, as the crew was working late again. Upon his arrival, we rushed over to my parent's house and finally had dinner around 8 p.m. He had been working so much, that I didn't want him to be too tired, as he had another busy job the next day, so I remember dropping him off at his Dad's house. It was already dark and I can picture him sitting in the passenger seat of my Mustang. To this day, I wish our goodbye wasn't so rushed, as he basically grabbed his belongings, and was out the door. I watched him go into the house and I backed out of the driveway, knowing I would see my son, Logan, early the next morning.
I had spent the night at my parent's house and was trying to get out the door quickly, as I had to give Logan a ride to work. I was running late, as he was to be on the job site by 7:30 a.m. On my way down his road, my phone buzzed and it was Logan wondering where I was. I knew he didn't have much time to get to work, as it was already 7:10 a.m.
I quickly texted back, "On my way."
When I pulled in the driveway, he was already outside and he put his stuff in my trunk and we roared back out onto the road, so I could get him to work on time. We had some chit-chat on the way but had I known this would be the last 20 minutes that I would spend with him in person, I would have told him how much I loved him... how proud he had made me... how he was the best son I could ever ask for... I would have filled those minutes with a lifetime of praise, love, acceptance, and forgiveness for every argument we ever endured.
Unfortunately, the schedule of life had us both so preoccupied, that we did not exchange those types of statements, and I regret it to this day. I wish I had told him something of significance that I appreciated about him, every time I saw him, so that this could never haunt me.
I encourage you to tell the people you love, that you really do love them with all your heart... don't assume they know... don't neglect to give the hug because you're too rushed or other people are around and you are embarrassed... don't forget to express the way you truly feel... as it may be your last encounter and you won't know this until it is too late.
I am fortunate because I have made peace with my son... he knows exactly how I feel and the mistakes I have made. He may be gone physically, but he is very much a part of my life. He's there whenever I need him.
"How?" you may ask...
The spiritual connection with those you love never has to end. It is there for you any time you need it. I've learned that I simply have to talk to my son... out loud or in my mind... it doesn't matter. He can hear me... and he knows exactly how I feel because I tell him on a regular basis.
Our life together never ended... it just changed. I have a stronger bond with him, than anyone else on the planet... and that is because he can be there in an instant...
Whenever I call on him - He is there for me.
Connecting with our loved ones is as simple as having a conversation. Do it often enough, and it will start to come naturally to you.
To help ease your grief, find resources here:
During the summer before my son passed, he had been working for my now son-in-law, in the concrete industry. They were pulling late hours and hectic schedules, so I was trying to visit my son as often as possible during the months prior to his accident.
I remember waiting for him on his 18th birthday at my daughter's house, as the crew was working late again. Upon his arrival, we rushed over to my parent's house and finally had dinner around 8 p.m. He had been working so much, that I didn't want him to be too tired, as he had another busy job the next day, so I remember dropping him off at his Dad's house. It was already dark and I can picture him sitting in the passenger seat of my Mustang. To this day, I wish our goodbye wasn't so rushed, as he basically grabbed his belongings, and was out the door. I watched him go into the house and I backed out of the driveway, knowing I would see my son, Logan, early the next morning.
I had spent the night at my parent's house and was trying to get out the door quickly, as I had to give Logan a ride to work. I was running late, as he was to be on the job site by 7:30 a.m. On my way down his road, my phone buzzed and it was Logan wondering where I was. I knew he didn't have much time to get to work, as it was already 7:10 a.m.
I quickly texted back, "On my way."
When I pulled in the driveway, he was already outside and he put his stuff in my trunk and we roared back out onto the road, so I could get him to work on time. We had some chit-chat on the way but had I known this would be the last 20 minutes that I would spend with him in person, I would have told him how much I loved him... how proud he had made me... how he was the best son I could ever ask for... I would have filled those minutes with a lifetime of praise, love, acceptance, and forgiveness for every argument we ever endured.
Unfortunately, the schedule of life had us both so preoccupied, that we did not exchange those types of statements, and I regret it to this day. I wish I had told him something of significance that I appreciated about him, every time I saw him, so that this could never haunt me.
I encourage you to tell the people you love, that you really do love them with all your heart... don't assume they know... don't neglect to give the hug because you're too rushed or other people are around and you are embarrassed... don't forget to express the way you truly feel... as it may be your last encounter and you won't know this until it is too late.
I am fortunate because I have made peace with my son... he knows exactly how I feel and the mistakes I have made. He may be gone physically, but he is very much a part of my life. He's there whenever I need him.
"How?" you may ask...
The spiritual connection with those you love never has to end. It is there for you any time you need it. I've learned that I simply have to talk to my son... out loud or in my mind... it doesn't matter. He can hear me... and he knows exactly how I feel because I tell him on a regular basis.
Our life together never ended... it just changed. I have a stronger bond with him, than anyone else on the planet... and that is because he can be there in an instant...
Whenever I call on him - He is there for me.
Connecting with our loved ones is as simple as having a conversation. Do it often enough, and it will start to come naturally to you.
To help ease your grief, find resources here:
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