Butterfly Kisses From Beyond

 Many people have heard the phrase, "time heals all wounds"... In the case of grief, this is not necessarily correct.  Grief does transform as time passes; however, it never really truly ceases to exist. When you are first faced with the loss of a loved one, the pain is raw and emotional.  The feelings of helplessness and emptiness fill your entire being with dread.  Sometimes the emotions are so overwhelming, it's hard to imagine that the pain in your heart will ever stop aching. In my own journey of loss, I have watched my grief transform in many ways.  As I write this, I can't even fathom that I have existed on this planet without my son in physical presence for almost seven years.  In the early days of his passing, my heart was shattered and at that time, beyond repair.  It brought me into a tail-spin of crushing trauma to realize that I had to go on living, when I thought he could not. Over the course of my heart-wrenching journey, I've realized t...

 Our hearts are split into two, as we maneuver through one world, begging for the next. Our lives are intertwined through the fabric of time and space... and the universe beckons us forward. When you are thrust into a sea of grief, you aren't sure how to gain the footing you require to stand upon this Earth.  Your heart sees everything around you that has woven itself into your current life here... but there still remains a gnawing wonder of what it is like on the other side of death. Your loved one has transitioned into the "unknown" and you long for their presence, even when you are standing in the midst of your family and friends.  You are surrounded by those you care about, and your thoughts float off into the dark crevasses of the mind to explore where you also want to be. Over the years, I have discovered that this twinge of pain will forever be present in my life here.  I have one child on the other side, while the other is basking in all that life has to offe...

 The road is rocky when it comes to losing a child. The path takes you to highs and lows, and you experience the wonderment  and detriment of life in the same breath. Over the last five years, I have learned lessons that I never would have experienced had I not been thrust into the label of a bereaved parent. I can honestly say that I likely would not have pondered the meaning of life and death so internally, if I had lived a life of certainty and basked within the traditional milestones. This is definitely not a journey I would ever want to repeat, but I am trying to understand what life is showing me... teaching me even. When you have something ripped out of your life in such an inhumane way, it startles your entire existence, and you are left standing there holding the bandage, as your wound bleeds all over the ground below you. You aren't sure what you are possibly going to do to survive the pain that is rushing towards you like a speeding freight train.  You simply s...

 For those who are suffering from the loss of a loved one, it appears on the surface that they are no longer with us. The physical connection is an overpowering obstacle to bear when someone we love transitions from this world into the next realm. It takes a willingness to learn about death from different perspectives, and a journey not many people want to take.  When faced with the loss of someone we love, we have never chosen a destiny filled with pain and sadness; however, our lives are submersed within this context by force. Our love lingers in our hearts, without a path to follow in the beginning of grief.  Only through understanding and research, can we discover what intricate details lie within the fabric of our existence.  We assure ourselves that we are not going crazy at exploring this side of our world, as our thoughts can be riddled with curiosity and wonder. Through reading and studying, it is possible to give notion to something more beyond this world....

It is easy to hide from the world... but is it healthy long term? When grief comes knocking at your front door, all you want to do is slink back into the safety of your home and lock the outside world away. When we are dealing with the death of a loved one, the external world continues to revolve through their regular routines, and pleasures while the grieving heart is leaking all over the floor of our homes. We learn that society is not too comfortable with the reality of loss, and many tend to shy away from the person who is falling apart inside the isolation of their retreat.  The emotions are intense and many find that their friends and family can't handle the turmoil of dealing with someone so out of control of their own reactions. The early days of dealing with the death of someone we love, leave us in a state of confusion, fogginess, and loathing because no one understands the devastation we are feeling.  These are truly non-judgmental aspects of ...

Calming the heart is a never-ending process. Grief will always be a part of us... there is no journey that ever truly finds a finish line. The feeling of loss and emptiness from losing a loved one will remain, no matter how many years pass. You may be surrounded by joy, love, and happiness, and still there is a void that looms over your existence, as a part of you has disappeared from this realm.  You can be grateful in one breath, and breathless from sorrow in the next instance.  It is a feeling that we learn to live with... an adjustment to our way of life that somehow correlates within our adaptation to the way we now live our lives. Peace and serenity can exist alongside of sadness.  It takes some self-analysis, and examination of our inner core to be able to reside in a world of conflicting aspects, but it is possible.  You will be able to experience great ambitions and expectations, even though a part of your life is completely erased fr...

The death of a loved one is heart-wrenching. It doesn't matter if it is your parent, spouse, child, sibling, relative, close friend, or even a pet; it ultimately affects you. All feelings of grief are worthy. If you have a deep bond with another soul, you will be bound with the suffering and emptiness of loss when they are no longer with us. Society has not prepared us for the devastation that occurs when someone we love dies.  We are often left on our own accord, to find ways of coping the emotional torment that is thrust upon our lives. We look to families, professionals, and friends to assist us in our journey of pain and many times, we are faced with closed doors and hearts, as we feel so misunderstood. I believe many people are not versed in how to handle another's grief, so some would rather ignore the fact that it exists entirely.  It leaves the vast majority of the population to suffer silently.  Sometimes we are blessed with those gifted individuals who ...

Once you travel the road of grief, this burning question  will be embedded into your conscious mind. "Does The Afterlife Really Exist?" Finding evidence that life goes on after death can be daunting. There are many things in life that seem to be shroud in mystery, and the new normal that one experiences with the loss of a loved one, questions what we truly believe about the afterlife. Perhaps when you were younger, you didn't question death all that much.  You may have had grandparents that died, and you were sad to have lost their physical presence, but perhaps you didn't quite ponder what really happened to them? I faced death a few times in my early adult years, as I lost a close classmate in high school, and my grandparents when I was in my twenties, but I never really questioned if spirit world existed at any deep level.  My life proceeded to go on, and my mind was busy with the traditional milestones of career, marriage, and children.  I didn...